Over the last six months I have been fighting the good fight against the whole “get a job” mentality. There is an energy that runs through this statement that feels very similar to “women should stay at home.” I hate being told what to do, and I was stuck on fighting. I could hear this caricature of an old grumpy man telling me “Torin, get a job!” and, “This is just how the world works.” Quite frankly I was not going to let him win and I was certainly not going to lose. Losing meant giving up on my dreams… again, leading a dull boring life, and being stuck in some dead end job FOREVER. Winning meant living my dreams, having a fulfilling and meaningful life, and feeling the freedom of possibility. This is the black and white, uncompromising, worldview I put myself in. Either life was going to be awesome or life was going to suck and there was no grey in between.
In this case gray means compromise. Compromise does not come easy to me. I want to have my cake and eat it too all the time… especially if it’s chocolate. In terms of this cake, the cake of being a fulltime, part-time-jobless, coach; all the ingredients are mixed together, in a pan, and baking in the oven. I have set myself an awesome foundation to work as a part time coach and what I need now is time and people! Because let me tell you, when this cake is finished baking I’m going to need some friends, connections, and community to help me enjoy it in all of its deliciousness.
Knowing that building my community is most important to me right now, allows me to step out of the stuck place of black and white, winner loser ickiness, and into the grey possibility. Within the grey of possibility I am now embracing a part time job that allows me to meet people, make new friends in my new home, and build an even larger network of amazing human beings! How exciting is that? Losing just a little bit (my pride) allows for an even bigger win.
And now it is your turn. What are you fighting hard against? How is that serving you? What black and white situations are you putting yourself in? What is the grey in between? While I was going through this work I also had the support of an awesome coach...and now you know where to find one. Happy dream living!